Saturday, July 30, 2011

Barbie Convention Goers Rival Her Intelligence

As if there weren't enough of a weirdo population in South Florida, Mattel has decided to up the ante and have the National Barbie Doll Collector's Convention here on our strange-loving shores.

Barbie sales, as you may not know, are still growing more than 10 percent a year. Not bad for a franchise that started over 50 years ago.

“Yes, Barbie is an older woman,” says staff writer Daniela Abratt. Thanks. I really couldn't do the math on that when you told me she was over 50 years old.

As this is a collector's convention, there are definitely some notable attendees. Sandi Holder, one of the stranger collectors, is losing herself in a Barbie Dream Land to forget her mounting debt. “At the Convention, we try not to talk about the real world,” she says. Funny enough, if you replace the word “Convention” with “newsroom,” you basically have the philosophy of the Herald. Not this article, though. This one has international significance.

Another weirdo, Eric Chatillon from France, only collects classic Barbies that remind him of his aunt. Ever since he dropped a doll from the 10th floor of his family's apartment as a child and broke its leg he's never been unkind to another one.

Lastly, we have the “brand manager,” or in layman's terms, “spineless PR person” Katie Phillips, who makes Barbie seem like she's as great as The New Deal.“I thought I could do anything because Barbie could,” said Phillips, who must of obviously lacked some real in-the-flesh role models to be taking her cues from a doll. But then, she probably wouldn't work for Mattel if she didn't.


  1. Who the fuck wrote this? And does he or she consider themselves objective?

  2. Whoever wrote this is a jerk

  3. Wow. How can you be so disrespectful to these people? Where is your integrity?

  4. wtf i want an old barbie doll >:l

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